Red Emma’s

When Chris Arnone was born in Independence, Missouri, nobody could tell what sex he was. For the first few days of his life, until a chromosome test confirmed he was a boy, his parents called him Baby. From this first, literal “coming out,” it was clear he was different. His life was punctuated by a string of surgeries and trips to the ER, unrecognizable and confusing diagrams in sex ed class, and the need to preface every intimate encounter by explaining his medical history. But it wasn’t until he was thirty-seven that he discovered he didn’t have “birth defects”—he was intersex.

In this fresh and affirming memoir, Chris’s struggles with anxiety, confusion, and a painful journey toward self-acceptance will be familiar to LGBTQIA+ people everywhere. But he also offers a perspective that is largely untold: that of an intersex man, existing in the toxic masculine culture of the heartland; parents who were open and accepting of his differences; and doctors who (mostly) did no harm.

It is a deep and wide exploration of religion and politics, gender and sexuality, frat parties, burlesque shows, and Magic: The Gathering. Arnone boldly shows how the lives of intersex folks can be so different and yet so familiar to everyone, helping us all take one step closer to understanding and acceptance.

With raw vulnerability, emotional range, and a quick wit, My Name Was Baby offers something inspiring for everyone, from self-assured manly men to confused genderqueer kids. It is the story of someone who came to love who he is and hopes everyone else can love themselves, too.